Courtesy of Peter, aka: Mr. PseudoPsalms
Here was the question from the audience:
Q: “If, despite your best diplomatic efforts, Iran attacks Israel, would you be willing to commit U.S. troops in support and defense of Israel? Or would you wait on approval from the U.N. Security Council?”
Obama: “…And that’s why I have consistently said that, if we can work more effectively with other countries diplomatically to tighten sanctions on Iran, if we can reduce our energy consumption through alternative energy, so that Iran has less money, if we can impose the kinds of sanctions that, say, for example, Iran right now imports gasoline, even though it’s an oil-producer, because its oil infrastructure has broken down, if we can prevent them from importing the gasoline that they need and the refined petroleum products, that starts changing their cost-benefit analysis. That starts putting the squeeze on them…”
I listened to that one sentence and while Sen. Obama was rambling through this terrible run-on sentence I realized that he had completely forgotten not only the question he was answering but that he had actually forgotten the beginning of his sentence:
1) “And that’s why I have consistently said that, if we can work more effectively with other countries diplomatically to tighten sanctions on Iran…that starts changing their cost-benefit analysis. That starts putting the squeeze on them.”
2) “if we can reduce our energy consumption through alternative energy, so that Iran has less money…that starts changing their cost-benefit analysis. That starts putting the squeeze on them.”
3) “if we can impose the kinds of sanctions that, say, for example, Iran right now imports gasoline, even though it’s an oil-producer, because its oil infrastructure has broken down…that starts changing their cost-benefit analysis. That starts putting the squeeze on them.”
4) “if we can prevent them from importing the gasoline that they need and the refined petroleum products, that starts changing their cost-benefit analysis. That starts putting the squeeze on them.”
comments:
1) Fine, except for the whole Russia/China veto thing on the Security Council
2) Don’t forget to properly inflate your tires while you’re at it, we all know how properly inflated tires scares the bejeebus out of Ahmadenijad
3) WHAT? That clause wasn’t even complete within the run-on sentence, as though not only did he forget the question and the beginning of his sentence but he forgot the middle of the sentence too. Yes, Iran imports gasoline…but what does that have to do with the ‘say, for example,’ part of this clause? Not only that but ‘sanctions’ was clause 1 AND clause 3.
4) ‘cost-benefit analysis’? Really?
Tel Aviv is radioactive and Obama’s opened up a spreadsheet? ‘the squeeze on them’? Channeling his inner Joe Pesci?
It’s a Twilight Zone answer, Israel’s been bombed and Obama falls back on a stump speech that he’s mis-remembered. No anger towards the murders of hundreds of thousands of Israelis, just a metaphoric shrug followed by financial statements at dawn, not too early, it was a late night drinking Chardonnay with the Ayers and a fierce game of Pictionary by the fireplace (unused, too much damage to the atmosphere from the smoke, not to mention the horrendous deaths of millions of innocent trees simply for human warmth. We turned the thermostat up instead, kept us nice and toasty). And didn’t you love what we did with the Lincoln bedroom? That picture of Che, with that cute little beret, was a perfect complement to the room, though Bernadine was right, as always, when she mentioned that Ol’ Abe’s dour expression really put a damper on the room, so now it’s just Che. Where were we? Oh, Pictionary, right?
Iran?
Are you sure? There was Chardonnay, maybe a little too much. But nothing about Iran that I remember. Israel? No, didn’t come up other than Bill’s great drawing for the phrase ‘Shitty Little Country.’ A true artist, he is. We ALL guessed that one correctly.
And before they left, I made sure they drove over the tire pressure sensor I had them install at the East Gate, no sense in helping the Iranians, you know.
–Peter S.